Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize