The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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