And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
