I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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