all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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