Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
she looked like the before picture.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
