drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
