I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
