I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
