He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Randomize
