party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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