I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
