did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Randomize
