he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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