I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
