My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
