Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
