at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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