I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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