On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
