I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
