just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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