Whatcha textin bout Willis?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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