Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
