Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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