? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
