Just cropdusted the office
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
