True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
