This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize
