And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize