I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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