Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize