Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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