she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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