I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i barfeds in our rink
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Randomize
