I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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