If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
