i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
