are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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