i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
