I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
3pm strippers are depressing
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Sorry about my life...
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
