I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
