Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
