I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
