I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
