I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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