I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
