I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Randomize
