We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
