Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
