Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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