got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
my liver is dry heaving
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
