i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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